Sleeping Lena
by NoName-chan
Summary: In the Kingdom of Innocence, there's a princess named Lenalee with a curse. On her 16th birthday, she's destined to fall asleep for 100 years! So, she's been hidden away. Only thing- she has no idea that she's a princess! Enter Lavi: a playboy prince who's upset about his engagement. What happens when the two cross paths? (Sleeping Beauty AU; Semicrack; LaviLena, Yullen, KroryMira)
1. Prologue

**NoName-chan: I'M BACK, BABY! XD  
Kanda: Nobody cares.  
Lenalee and Lavi: We're the main characters of this fic! :D  
Allen: Wait, what? Start over. What's happening here?  
NoName-chan: Well, when I said "I'M BACK, BABY! XD", I was referring to the fact that this is the first time in a while that I've posted/updated any comedy fics. The only thing I've done recently is begin my mystery fic, "Off Radar," and so far, nobody likes it. At all. But, hey, I like it so I'll continue it at some point. Anyways, I came up with the idea to do a Sleeping Beauty DGM Crossover** **about a month ago. So I'd jotted down the idea, but I hadn't actually started writing it. Then two days ago, I went through all my story ideas to see what to keep and what to delete and came across the idea for this. I still really liked the idea, so I decided to actually start writing it. I got bored. REALLY quickly. I was actually about to delete what I'd written so far when the best idea ever came to me: I COULD MAKE THIS A SEMI-CRACK COMEDY FIC! So I did.** **AND IT WAS SO MUCH FUN TO WRITE! XD Plus, out of all my stories so far, the one that's doing the best is my one and only semi-crack Oneshot, "The Karaoke Plan." Apparently, you people think I'm funny when I make DGM characters do stupid things, so here we are! Though, remember: this is SEMI-crack. It's incredibly cracky, yes, but there IS an actual story here! So, yeah. This contains LaviLena, Yullen, and possible KroryxMiranda**.  
**Allen: WOW. That explanation was REALLY long. And I didn't really ask about the pairings, but okay. So the main pairing is LaviLena, and then there's Yullen and possible Kror- WAIT, YULLEN?! WHAT?!  
Lavi: *dies of laughter*  
Lenalee: *Gets nosebleed*  
Kanda: ... I'm going to end you. *Pulls out Mugen*  
NoName-chan: EEP! *starts running* Someone... *pant* please... *pant* do... *pant* the Disclaimer!  
Road: How about Miranda? Her stuttering is funny.  
Miranda: N-N-NoName-chan does n-not own D-DGM!**

_**...**_

It was a joyous day in the kingdom of Innocence. The subjects of the kingdom were awoken early that morning to the announcement that the king and queen's daughter had been born. Everybody rejoiced- that is, everybody except a certain fairy named Road.

That day, there had been a party planned where the newborn's three chosen fairy godparents would bestow magical gifts upon her. Road had volunteered herself to be one of these fairy godparents nearly the second she'd heard of the child's upcoming arrival.

_'The king and queen sat side by side in their thrones, genuine smiles set on their lips. The queen had recently discovered that she would soon be a mother, and both her and her loving husband were overjoyed._

_ That is, until the large stained glass window of the throne room shattered revealing a beaming fairy with spiky blue hair, golden eyes, a pink, pumpkin-topped umbrella in one hand, thigh-high purple striped socks, and a short, jagged, black dress that matched in color with the set of translucent wings that grew from her back._

_"R-ROAD?" the king stuttered after finally recovering from her shocking entrance._

_"Good afternoon, Royals!" Road greeted rudely._

_"What is it that you need?" the queen questioned._

_"I heard that you finally got preggers, Queen! 'Bout time!" the darkly dressed fairy exclaimed. "I came here to tell you that I'll be sure to give your child the best gift I possibly can!"_

_The king raised an eyebrow. "What makes you think we're going to let you give our child a gift?"_

_Road laughed. "Why wouldn't you? I'm going to be one of his or her fairy godparents, after all!"_

_"No way in hell," the king replied shortly. Road's grin changed to a frown._

_"Whaaaat? Why nooooot?" she whined._

_The king rolled his eyes. "For one thing, we don't like you, nor do we trust you in any way whatsoever. Then there's the fact that you aren't exactly good with gifts. We let you give our son a gift, and now he's a psychopath who builds giant robots all day!"_

_"Hey! I think the mad scientist gift is pretty cool!" the fairy defended._

_"No! Just no! You aren't giving our newborn a gift, and that's final!" the king shouted._

_Road's expression turned dark. "Alright. FINE. But know that this isn't over. I'll make sure you regret this." After exchanging one last glare with the royal couple, the fairy flew from the throne room back the way she'd come.'_

Now the child had been born- a baby girl. Road was beyond enraged. She knew exactly how she'd get back at the king and queen for refusing her "gracious" offer.

The party began once the sun had set. The subjects of the kingdom filtered into the castle and to a large ballroom where the party was at. Everybody there was on their toes, craning to get a look at one thing: the baby princess who slept peacefully in a golden cradle near the center of the room. The king and queen stood nearby, smiling joyfully at the child, while waiting for the rest of the guests to arrive so that they could begin the ceremony. Soon enough, a child of about eight years came bounding up to the couple, his dark purple hair singed from one of the many experiments he'd ran that day.

"Mom! Dad! The fairies are almost here!" he told them, grinning widely.

"Thank you, Komui," the queen said with a smile, gently adjusting the small bow that laid around her son's neck.

"About how much longer will they be-?" the king began before he was interrupted by a loud shout.

"MOYASHI! GET BACK HERE!"

"NO WAY, BAKANDA!" a second voice shot back.

"P-P-P-PLEASE C-CALM D-DOWN, Y-YOU T-TWO!" a third stuttered nervously. The king, queen, and prince all turned around to find a short boy who appeared to be about 15 with white hair, silver eyes, and and odd red scar over his left eye bounding toward them, the pair of red fairy wings sprouting from his back opening and closing slowly as if he were resisting the urge to fly above the crowd. Close behind him, another boy was giving chase, swinging a katana in an attempt to slice up the other boy. He was about a head taller than the first and looked to be a few years older with sharp angular features, dark cobalt eyes, long blue hair pulled up into a high ponytail, and a pair of dark blue fairy wings that completely contradicted his entire being. Then, finally, several meters behind them, a woman appearing to be in her mid twenties ran, desperately trying to stop the first two, but being unable to catch up as she tripped on nearly everything in her path. Tears flowed from her dark brown eyes, causing the large dark circles around them to sparkle with moisture. Her shoulder-length curly hair held a similar hue to her eyes, despite the small bits of food and drink that adorned it due to her clumsy entrance. From her back, a pair of purple wings bounced up and down as she continued to trip and run at the same time.

Sweat dropped from the royalties' foreheads as they watched the three fairies they had chosen to be their newborn daughter's fairy godparents run about the ballroom, attracting stares of surprise and annoyance wherever they went.

Finally, the queen put a stop to this by greeting simply, "Allen, Kanda, Miranda! It's so lovely to see you!"

The three fairies stopped in their tracks as the queen's sweet voice reached their ears. Their faces began to flush from embarrassment due to the fact that she'd caught them in their childish act.

"IM SO SORRY!" Miranda wailed, dropping to the floor in front of the queen, who chuckled at the familiar behavior.

"It's quite alright. We cant start yet, anyway. We're still waiting for-Ah! Here they are now!"

The three fairies as well as the members of the royal family turned to see the last of their guests arrive- an elderly man with only a single tuft of hair on his head and black circles surrounding his eyes followed by a boy of about 3 with fiery red hair and sparking emerald eyes.

"Good evening, King Bookman," the queen greeted with a friendly smile.

"The same to you, madam," he responded politely, but without the slightest hint of emotion upon his face. The queen then turned her attention to the young boy who stared at the golden cradle where the baby laid in wonder.

"And you must be Prince Lavi," the kind woman greeted with another one of her breathtaking smiles. The young prince looked up at her and nodded his head in response. "Are you here to meet your future wife for the first time?"

The boy's two emerald eyes shot wide. "W-w-wife?" he stuttered. The queen blinked slowly in understanding at his confusion.

"Yes, the young princess sleeping in the cradle will one day be your bride."

"But I don't wanna marry some baby!" Lavi complained, earning a chuckle from the queen.

"Maybe not now, but one day, you may see differently. Anyways, now that you both have arrived, we can begin the gifting ceremony," she said loudly enough for the other guests to hear. All attention was turned to the center of the room where the king, queen, and prince of Innocence kingdom, the three fairy godparents, and the king and prince of Black Order kingdom stood around the golden cradle where the young princess slept peacefully.

"We have decided upon the name we shall give our child!" the king announced. "Her name shall be Lenalee, decided by the queen, the prince, and myself." The entire room cheered in joy, some toasting, "to Princess Lenalee!"

"Now, allow me to introduce Lenalee's three chosen fairy godparents," the king spoke again. The boy with the red wings took a step forward. "Allen Walker." The boy with the blue wings took a step forward as well. "Yuu Kanda." Although it took a slight shove from the queen, the woman with the purple wings stepped forward lastly. "And Miranda Lotto."

The queen spoke this time. "You may now each present one magical gift to the sleeping princess."

Kanda was the first to walk to the side of the golden cradle. "Che. I'm getting this over with. He then pulled a sparkling white wand from a pocket of his black coat, which once again contradicted his entire being, and gently touched the point of it the the princess' forehead. "I grant you the gift of combat, so that you may defend yourself from every harm."

"Seriously, BaKanda?! Combat?! You give a baby girl the ability to FIGHT?! What a stupid gift!" Allen exclaimed in annoyance, earning a death glare from Kanda.

"Oh really? Then what's your fantastic gift, baka moyashi?"

Allen stepped forward, shoving the blue haired fairy aside, and pulled out a wand similar to that of Kanda's. He then made a gesture identical to his and allowed the point of the wand to rest on the baby's forehead. "I give you the gift of beauty, so that all will forever remember your face."

"Wow. Way to be a pervert, moyashi," Kanda smirked.

"Pervert-? WHAT THE HELL?! OH GOD, NO! IM HUNDREDS OF YEARS OLDER THAN HER!"

"Oh, so it's pedophelia?"

"BAKANDA!"

"MOYASHI!"

"AHEM," the queen interrupted before the two boys could get out of hand. "Miranda still needs to present her gift." Allen and Kanda nodded shamefully before stepping away from the cradle. Miranda took their place, replicating their movements with her wand shakily.

"I-I g-give you t-the gift o-of true l-love, so t-that you m-may find the g-greatest happiness t-there is." Everybody sighed in awe at Miranda's gift- except Lavi, of course, who shivered in fear at what it may have meant for him.

"And so concludes the gifting ceremony," the queen announced. "Lenalee had been given the gifts of combat, beauty, and true love."

"Not so fast!" a new voice rang out. Road burst through a beautifully designed stained glass window.

The king groaned. "Can you PLEASE stop breaking my windows? Stained glass is expensive!"

Road ignored him and continued. "King and Queen Lee have disgraced me by declining my offer to be a fairy godparent of the newborn princess, Lenalee, insulting my ability to give excellent gifts-"

"Hey, I think the mad scientist thing is pretty cool!" Komui offered.

"SEE? I TOLD YOU SO! -and refusing to invite me to this party. So as punishment for their rude deeds, I shall be giving the princess a gift of my own, with or without permission!" She flew over to the princess' bedside, raising a shimmering black wand. "I bestow upon you a curse! On your 16th birthday, you shall prick your finger upon a spinning wheel here in the castle. When you do so, you shall die!"

The entire room went silent until Allen spoke up. "... Isn't that a little harsh for not being invited to a party?"

Road turned to glare at the boy, but upon laying her eyes upon him, tackled him with a flying hug. "AAAAALLLLLLLEEEENNNN~!"

"AGH- GET OFF!" Allen shouted. Road pouted.

"Oh, fine~ I've finished what I came here to do anyway. But hey," Road handed Allen a small slip of paper with a wink. "Call me~"

Allen stared at the paper for a few moments. "... What am I supposed to do with a bunch of numbers?"

Road rolled her eyes. "Are you deaf? CALL ME." The rest of the room stared at her in bewilderment. Suddenly, a girl with long white hair and eyes that changed color stepped forward and started whispering something in Road's ear. The dark fairy's face formed an expression of realization. "OOOOH So this is set in medieval times. I get it now."

"Who the hell is that?" Kanda asked, pointing to the white haired girl.

"That's NoName-chan," Road replied easily.

"NoName-chan?"

"You know? The authoress?" Kanda gave her a blank stare. The white haired girl, NoName-chan, whispered something else in Road's ear. "Wait, you mean I'm the only one aware that there's an authoress and that this is a story?" NoName-chan nodded her head.

"Authoress? Story? What?" Allen asked.

"Nothing~" Road replied in a sing song voice. "It'd take a long time to explain and it's really not that important. But, yeah, with that, I'll take my leave. Remember: 16th birthday. Spinning wheel. Death. K? K." And with that, Road exited by smashing through an even larger window than the one through which she'd entered, earning another groan from the king, and disappeared into the night.

The queen burst into tears. "OUR POOR BABY LENALEE!" The king and older prince soon joined in.

"W-w-wait! W-we cant completely b-break the c-curse, b-but I think w-we can c-change it!" Miranda stammered, raising her wand, and looking at the other two fairies expectantly. They seemed to get the message and did the same as the entire kingdom watched them hopefully. Miranda began to counter the curse with the help of Allen and Kanda. The magic of their wands sparkled brightly, which ONCE AGAIN completely contradicted Kanda's entire being, and soon dimmed back to their normal glow.

"Well?" the king asked expectantly.

"W-well, w-we did the b-best we c-could, your m-majesty," Miranda stammered.

"And?"

"We were able to change it so that rather than death, she will sleep a deep sleep along with the rest of the kingdom for 100 years or until she is awoken by true love's kiss," Allen answered.

"W-what?" the king stammered in shock.

Somebody put a hand on Prince Lavi's shoulder. "It's all up to you, buddy." The redhead paled to a new shade of white before passing out.

"IM SORRY!" Miranda cried, throwing herself to the floor once again.

"No, Miranda, don't be. A deep sleep is much better than death. What you've done is much better. It's just that we wouldn't even be in this mess if it weren't for Road," the king explained.

"Well, there are some things that we can do to prevent the curse from coming true," the queen suggested, and the room turned their attention to her. "First of all, we must dispose of all the spinning wheels in the kingdom. As long as she never pricks her finger, the curse cannot come true."

The king nodded his head. "Spinning wheels are hereby banished from the kingdom for the next 16 years! They shall all be burned tonight!" The kingdom shouted in agreement before marching from the palace to search the land for spinning wheels.

The king marched off as well to do his part of the burning arrangements, and Komui left to help King Bookman drag Prince Lavi, who was still unconscious, to their room for the night. Soon, the ballroom was empty except for the queen, the three fairies, and little Princess Lenalee.

The fairies turned to help with the burning when they were suddenly stopped by the queen's voice. "Wait! I have one last thing I want to ask of you three as Lenalee's fairy godparents."

"Anything at all, your majesty," Allen said for all three of them, and neither of the other two fairies objected.

"While everyone is distracted by the burning of the spinning wheels, I want you three to take Lenalee deep into the forest somewhere. Build a cottage. Raise her there as a commoner until her 16th birthday has passed. Then bring her back here so that she may resume her life as a princess. But whatever you do, don't allow her to come back into the kingdom or tell her who she really is until then. And please keep her safe."

The queen's request shocked the three fairies. They couldn't believe that the queen was selfless enough to give up her daughter in order to keep her safe. But nonetheless, they accepted, and when the fire was at its highest and the inhabitants of the kingdoms were all distracted by the burning of the spinning wheels, the three fairies snuck out with Lenalee, doing as the queen instructed them and using their magic to create a cottage for them all to live in for the next 16 years in the middle of the forest, far away from any town.

And from there, they raised Lenalee in secret, not giving her even the slightest clue as to who she really was.

_Prologue End_

_**...**_

**Allen: ...  
Kanda: ...  
Lavi: ...  
Lenalee: ...  
Miranda: ...  
Road: ...  
NoName-chan: *sips tea*  
All: YOU PUT YOURSELF IN THE STORY?!  
NoName-chan: Yup.  
All: WHY?!  
NoName-chan: Because I'm going to have a lot of fun with this *Evil grin*  
Road: *Yelp* Her grin is even scaring ME!  
Miranda: W-wow. T-that's saying something!  
Allen: I fear for my masculinity.  
Kanda: I fear for my dignity.  
Lavi: I fear for my life as a bachelor.  
Lenalee: I fear for my virginity.  
Komui: I also fear for Lenalee's virginity. And her purity. AND HER BEAUTIFUL SMILE! AND-  
NoName-chan: *knocks Komui out with a shovel* NO RANTING!  
Road: Nah, you'll be fine, Lenalee. This is rated T.  
NoName-chan:** **Yup~! Anyways, I already have Chapter 1 written. It's like twice as long as the prologue, very crack-y, a bit fluffy, incredibly demoralizing for Allen, Kanda, and Lavi, and contains mass amounts of bucket abuse! Stay tuned~!**


	2. Chapter 1

**NoName-chan: Hello again, my prettys~!  
Allen, Kanda, Lavi: *groan*  
Road: What's their problem?  
NoName-chan: Oh, they're just mad because this chapter is incredibly demoralizing for them.  
Lenalee: Hey, I happen to LIKE this chapter!  
Lavi: Well, of course YOU do! YOU don't get tortured.  
Allen: In fact, you get a lot more credit than you honestly should.  
Lenalee: Eh  
Kanda: Che.  
Road: ….. Okay then. Anyways, although they were already spoken of in the Prologue's EndNote, NoName-chan has some warnings for you about this chapter! NoName-chan?  
NoName-chan: Thank you, Road. Anyways, WARNING: This Chapter of "Sleeping Lena" contains a LOT of crack, major demoralization for Allen, Kanda, and Lavi, some fluffy-ness, poorly based accusations of being a pervert, and mass amounts of bucket abuse!  
Lavi: AHEM.  
NoName-chan: What?  
Lavi: I think you're forgetting the mass amounts of LAVI ABUSE!  
Kanda: Nobody cares.  
Lavi: D:  
Road: Can we just get on with this already?  
Lavi: No.  
Kanda: No.  
Allen: No.  
Lenalee: Yes.  
NoName-chan: Hm…. So that's 3 votes for no, and 1 vote for yes… ON WITH THE STORY IT IS~!  
Allen: HOW IS THAT A FAIR CONTEST?!  
Road: It isn't. But since anybody who's reading this right now is expecting story, we can't exactly NOT have one.  
Kanda: Why not?  
NoName-chan: Because….. Um…..*knocks Kanda out with a shovel* STOP DEFYING ME!  
Lavi: Where does she keep getting all these shovels from?!  
NoName-chan: *knocks Lavi out with the shovel* NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!  
Allen: Okay, someone do the Disclaimer before NoName-chan kills somebody with that shovel of hers.  
Road: Miranda?  
Miranda: N-N-NoName-chan d-does not o-own DGM.**

**_... _**

"ALLEN-KUN, KANDA, MIRANDA!" Lenalee shouted.

Allen and Miranda looked up from their books, and Kanda stopped practicing with his katana long enough to listen.

"Yes, Lenalee?" Allen asked, standing up.

"I'm going out to go get some water by the river," she replied. The three fairies once again took in her appearance. It was amazing how much she'd grown over the past 15 years. Lenalee was beautiful to say the least- though that was probably at least partially due to Allen's gift- with long, silky, dark green hair, soft porcelain skin, two big violet eyes, and a smile even more breathtaking than her mother's.

"Okay, just please be careful and don't talk to any strangers," Allen warned. Lenalee rolled her eyes.

"Honestly, Allen, I turn 16 next week! I think I can take care of myself."

Allen shivered. The fact that it was almost her 16th birthday just made him even more cautious. But of course, Lenalee had no way of knowing that. He, Kanda, and Miranda had raised her to believe that she was just a commoner of the kingdom. They also raised her to believe that the people of the kingdom were dangerous, and that she should never leave to forest where their cottage was or talk to strangers. Lenalee, being the young impressionable girl she was, trusted their lies without a second thought. So of course, she knew nothing of the fact that she was a princess or of the fact that she was destined to be fall into a 100 year sleep in a week.

"Yeah, but..." Allen frantically searched for a good reason to be extra careful. "There's... Um... PERVERTS!"

Lenalee, Kanda, and Miranda all stared at Allen oddly.

"Perverts?" Lenalee asked.

"Uh... Y-yeah," Allen stuttered. "Men who will try to kidnap you because of your looks. Now that you're almost 16, any man who sees you might try something."

"Or woman," Kanda added in a tone that Allen knew was mocking him.

Lenalee paled. "O-o-okay, I'll be extra careful."

Kanda rolled his eyes. "You don't have to be TOO careful. I trained you to be able to defend yourself, so if anybody tries anything, just beat them up."

Allen jabbed Kanda hard with his elbow. "NO, SHE SHOULD STILL BE CAREFUL, BAKANDA!"

"DON'T TOUCH ME, MOYASHI!"

Lenalee rolled her eyes. "Honestly, you two. You should really stop fighting and just give in already. It's obvious that all of this fighting between you guys is just unresolved sexual tension."

Kanda and Allen gaped at her in horror while Miranda looked like she was holding in laughter.

"W-WHAT?! NO! I'D NEVER-" Kanda and Allen began in unison until they were once again interrupted by Lenalee.

"See? You're practically sharing a mind. Just get a room already." Miranda burst out laughing while Lenalee smirked at the absolute terror on the two boys' faces. "Now, if that's all, I'm going to go get that water now." And with that, Lenalee grabbed an empty bucket and headed out from the cottage into the forest.

Lenalee couldn't help but smile at her obvious victory over Allen and Kanda. Even though they were hundreds of years old and had raised her with the help of Miranda, they were still about the same as her when it came to maturity, so she loved how easy it was to mess with them. She knew exactly where to poke fun, too. Kanda hated the fact that he had pretty fairy wings and a sparkly wand, so she loved to make fun of him for being girly. Allen was even easier to get at. All she had to do was say something about his short height. Then, to get them both riled up, she just had to accuse them of secretly liking each other. Though, Lenalee couldn't deny it- she didn't exactly think those accusations were false.

Nonetheless, Lenalee cheerfully half walked, half danced to the river. Once she reached the small clearing where she usually went to get water, Allen's warnings suddenly came back to her. An eerie chill ran down her spine. What if he was right? What if there really were perverts in the forest? What if there was an evil authoress that would summon someone to kidnap her? She then shook her head rapidly. How could she let such childish thoughts overcome her? _'An authoress. What a stupid idea. That's impossible,'_ Lenalee thought to herself before pushing all thoughts of perverts to the back of her mind by humming a cheerful tune and filling the bucket she'd brought with water, though she knew that she was still on edge no matter how hard she tried to relax. She continued humming and soon found herself dancing around the clearing, bucket in hand. That is, she was until she heard a loud rustling of leaves behind her.

Lenalee's head snapped in the direction of the rustling. Loud footsteps started each echoing around

the clearing. The familiar fears of perverts began to run through the girl's mind again. The footsteps got closer and closer and she began to run, only to trip over a tree root, the bucket flying out of her hands and across the clearing. _'THERE IS AN EVIL AUTHORESS OUT TO GET ME AFTER ALL!'_ she thought in horror. The footsteps got closer and closer, until finally the leaves started rusting madly. Lenalee screamed and closed her eyes tightly. Until suddenly the noises stopped. She cracked open her eyes to see a squirrel right in front of her, staring at her. _'... It was a squirrel?'_ The creature cocked its head at her and she blinked at it. It then returned the way it came, it's footsteps way louder than a squirrel's should have been.

Lenalee sighed with relief and pulled herself up. She then began chuckling. _'Im panicking over nothing. There's no authoress or perverts in these woods. Allen and Kanda are crazy. I'm perfectly saf-' _Her thoughts were interrupted as a hand touched her shoulder and a voice spoke to her.

"Um, are you okay?" it asked. Lenalee paled. It was a MAN'S voice. She considered what to do frantically. Maybe run? No. She couldn't do that. She'd dropped her bucket. There was no way she could just leave a perfectly good bucket. Then Kanda's advice replayed in her mind.

So she whirled around and kicked the person in the face, screaming, "PERVERT!"

**_..._**

Prince Lavi was a bit annoyed. He'd finally returned to Innocence kingdom for the first time in nearly 16 years, and all he heard about was "It's almost Princess Lenalee's birthday" this and "What if the curse comes true?" that. Then there were others who were celebrating because the princess was supposed to come back the next week. Nobody had seen her since the day she'd been born. Apparently the queen had made some arrangements or something and the princess had been taken away to some secret location to keep her safe.

But truthfully, Lavi really didn't care. He was a bit upset that he had to give up his awesome life as a bachelor for some little princess he didn't even know. He was supposed to finally meet her the day after her birthday the following week, and the both of them were to wed a week after that. Which meant that he wouldn't be able to flirt with anybody anymore except for some dumbass princess who was destined to sleep for 100 years.

"Are you SURE that we can't cancel the engagement or something, Gramps?" Lavi asked for probably the thousandth time that day.

"NO. You are going to marry the princess, and that's final!" King Bookman replied, sending Lavi to the floor with a kick to the face.

"OW, YOU OLD PANDA! THAT FREAKING HURT! And how am I supposed to marry someone I've never even talked to? For god's sake, I can't even remember her name!" Lavi argued, earning another kick to the head.

"STOP CALLING ME PANDA!" King Bookman snapped. "Now if you have nothing better to do, go make yourself useful and hunt or something!"

Lavi rolled his emerald green eyes but did as his grandfather had said and walked off. After retrieving a simple bow and a sheath of arrows, he stalked off to a nearby forest to "hunt."

Of course, in reality, he wasn't hunting at all. He was just walking around, sulking. That is, until he heard a sweet sound. A cheerful tune was being hummed somewhere nearby. The voice that hummed the tune was beautiful and captivating, and anybody would've stopped just to listen.

Except for Lavi. Lavi was already pissed, and the song just made him even more annoyed. So he stomped through the forest until he reached a clearing, where he saw a figure dancing around, humming. He was about to yell at them to shut the hell up when he got a good look at their face. It was a beautiful girl with long silky locks of dark green hair that fell slightly past her small waist and large violet eyes that sparkled with cheerfulness.

_'STRIKE' _was Lavi's first thought as he watched the girl dance around like an idiot from the cover of the trees. Until suddenly, she looked at a bush with fear in her eyes and attempted to run. Except she tripped, throwing a bucket of water across the clearing, where it hit Lavi in the face.

"OWYOUDUMBBITCHWHATTHEHELL?!" Lavi shouted, rubbing the bleeding bruise where the bucket had hit him on his cheek before freezing. What if she'd heard him? She'd think he was stalking her, or WORSE- throw another bucket! He cautiously looked over at the girl, but to his strange relief, she was screaming loudly and hadn't been able to hear him. Lavi wondered what she was screaming at when suddenly, a squirrel walked up to her. _'Wait, what? It was a squirrel?'_ The weird thing was, the squirrel looked like it was LAUGHING at her. Like it knew that it had just scared the daylights out of her. It only stopped when she opened her eyes and looked at its, now nonchalant, face. The creature then walked away and the girl stood up, chuckling.

Lavi looked at her for a few moments then realized that he should probably introduce himself so that she didn't assault him with more buckets. After picking up the original bucket, which now had his blood on it, and putting on a friendly smile, Lavi approached the younger teen. He then set a hand on her shoulder gently and began with, "Um, are you okay?"

What he didn't expect was for her to kick him in the face and scream "PERVERT!"

The kick sent Lavi sprawling on the ground and the bucket high in the air. "OW! WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM?!" he shouted.

"YOU'RE A PERVERT AND YOU WERE ABOUT TO ASSAULT ME!" she shouted back.

"I WAS ABOUT TO ASSAULT YOU?! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO KEEPS GIVING ME HEAD WOUNDS! BETWEEN THAT KICK AND THAT DAMN BUCKET, YOU'RE THE ONE ASSAULTING ME! I WAS JUST TRYING TO RETURN YOUR STUPID BUCKET WHICH NEARLY GAVE ME A GODDAMN CONCUSSION, AND YOU JUST KICKED ME AND ACCUSED ME OF BEING A PERVERT! WHATS YOUR PROBL-?!" Lavi's rant was interrupted as the bucket in question finally fell back down from the sky again, hitting him in the head and knocking him out.

**_..._**

Lavi woke up to the girl looming over him, glaring. He began to sit up when she snapped, "Don't move!"

Lavi rolled his eyes. "Or what?"

"Or I'll throw my bucket at you again." Lavi's eyes shot wide in horror at the thought of the deadly bucket, and he nodded his head quickly and froze. "Now, who are you and what do you want?" the girl demanded, her violet eyes sparkling dangerously.

Lavi gulped in fear. "I-I-I'm Lavi. I was hunting and I saw you and you threw your bucket at my face when you tripped and I tried to return it to you and you kicked me in the face and called me a pervert and then your bucket hit me in the head again and now you're seriously scaring me," Lavi spit out quickly. The girl's expression changed to one of confusion.

"Wait, so you're not a pervert out to kidnap me?" she asked.

"What? Of course not! Why would think I was?" Lavi asked back.

"Because my guardians told me that people are perverts and that I'm in danger when I'm out alone." The redhead stared at her with an eyebrow raised.

"That sounds like bullshit made up by overprotective parents to trick you into avoiding people."

The girl beamed. "I KNEW IT! I KNEW THEY WERE A COUPLE! But, wait, so people aren't all dangerous?"

Lavi shook his head. "No. I was actually hoping to befriend you." He then mentally slapped himself. Why did he say that? This girl was dangerous! Even if she was by far the prettiest girl he'd ever seen, he couldn't befriend her and her *shudder* BUCKET. But then he looked at her again. Truthfully, she really didn't seem all that dangerous... more like she was just afraid. He decided maybe having her as a friend wouldn't be so bad.

"B-befriend me?" the girl asked.

"Yeah. But PLEASE don't throw your bucket at me anymore!" The girl stared at him as if deciding whether or not to trust him. He looked into her violet eyes with sincerity in his own emerald green ones.

"Why should I trust you?" she asked. "I don't even have any idea who you are." Lavi then realized that she probably wasn't aware that he was a prince or that he was betrothed to the princess of her kingdom. He immediately decided it may be best not to tell her that- at least, not yet.

"Like I said, I'm Lavi. Nothing more, nothing less. And who are you, if I may ask?"

"I'm not telling you until I trust you. And so far, all I see you as is a potential threat."

Lavi smiled in amusement at her distrustfulness. "Well, how about this: spend the day with me. Right here in this clearing. We won't go anywhere, so there won't be any threat of me kidnapping you, especially with that death bucket of yours. Then at the end of the day, you can tell me if we can be friends or not." The girl seemed to consider this.

"Alright. I will," she stated, earning a smile from Lavi.

"Yay for friendship!" Lavi exclaimed in a childish voice. The girl looked like she was resisting the urge to laugh, so Lavi poked her cheek. "Come on, where's a smile?" The girl slowly began to giggle then finally laugh at his childishness. Lavi grinned, enjoying the sound of her laugh. "So can I get up now?" he asked.

"... I guess," she replied, her smile once again hidden by some sort of poker face. Lavi just grinned wider and stood up, rubbing his head and face wounds.

"You know, girl, I wouldn't dream of assaulting you in a million years. You're incredibly deadly when you want to be." The girl's face then formed an expression of smugness.

"I'm well trained to defend myself," she stated with a smirk. Lavi just chuckled.

"I noticed. Hold on, I may have some bandages or something with me." He the searched the leather pouch he'd brought with him for hunting, and soon found what he was looking for. After applying bandages to his head and face, he put them away.

The girl then started giggling. Lavi looked at her questioningly. "What?"

"It's just... You look like a mummy, with the bandages and all." The redhead grinned.

"Oh really? Well, I promise I won't eat your brain."

"That's zombies, not mummies."

"Eh same thing."

"So tell me about yourself." Lavi blinked.

"Eh?"

"Tell me about yourself. If you expect me to trust you, then you're going to have to tell me about yourself." The older boy gulped. Should he tell her the truth? About his royal status and all? Maybe... Maybe not...

"Well, I come from a wealthy family from another kingdom. We're a bit involved with the royal family here," he started. It wasn't a lie. It just wasn't the whole truth. "We're going to be here for a while. I, myself, am 19 years old. I live with my grandfather. He's a panda, and-"

The girl interrupted him. "WHAT?! YOUR GRANDFATHER'S A PANDA?!" Lavi chuckled.

"No, no, I meant that he looks like one because he has these big black circles around his eyes."

The girl chuckled. "Sounds a lot like one of my guardians. Though I think that's from a lack of sleep. She's really clumsy and nervous, plus she has to control my other two guardians who fight a lot, so I think that she's just really tired." Lavi smiled a bit at the girl for telling him something about herself. She seemed to notice her slip up as well and glared at him defiantly. "But I'm not saying anything else until I trust you!"

The redhead shrugged. "Whatever you say... Anyway, Gramps is ANCIENT. I swear, he's at least 1000 years old. He also kicks me in the face a lot and yells at me. Hey, he's a bit like you!" Lavi joked. The girls elbowed him in the stomach, but it was more playful and less deadly than her previous assaults, so Lavi only winced in pain a little bit. "He and I came here once almost 16 years ago, around the time we first got involved with the royals. We were there for the princess' gifting ceremony on the day she was born."

The girl frowned. "Princess? I thought there was just the king, queen, and prince."

Lavi shook his head. "Nope. Right after her gifting ceremony, an evil fairy placed a curse on her. On her 16th birthday, she's destined to prick her finger on a spinning wheel in the castle, causing her and the kingdom to fall into a deep sleep for 100 years or until her true love kisses her. Originally, she was supposed to die, but her fairy godparents changed that. To prevent the curse from coming true, the kingdom also banned spinning wheels and moved the princess to a secret location to be raised by her fairy godparents. Her 16th birthday's next week, so I guess we'll see if it works."

"Wow. But that's kind of weird. I would think my guardians would've told me about her when they schooled me, but I've never even heard of her. But at the same time, it's kind of cool. My 16th birthday is next week, too." Lavi grinned.

"What happened to keeping quiet about yourself?" The girl's face then formed an expression of anger.

"Y-yeah! I am! And that's the last I'm saying!"

"Suuure..."

"IT IS!"

"Anyways, yeah. I was originally at the castle because the prince of my kingdom had gone there along with the king for the gifting ceremony. The prince is my age, so both of us were only 3 at the time. It was actually there where he found out that he was engaged to the princess. Their arranged marriage is actually in two weeks, after the princess returns. That's why I'm here now. Gramps and I came here with the prince and king of my kingdom yesterday to witness the wedding."

"Well, that's good, that the princess is already engaged."

Lavi frowned. "What's good about that?"

"Well, since they are already engaged, the prince will be able to wake the princess up if the curse does come true," the girl reasoned.

Lavi shook his head angrily. "No, not at all." The girl raised an eyebrow.

"Why not?"

"Because I know the prince well, and he doesn't love her. He's never even truly met her. Would you want to marry someone you don't even know?" he nearly snapped, taking the younger girl by surprise.

"Well, in that case. They shouldn't marry. Unless they were to fall in love, they shouldn't have to marry," she offered quietly. Lavi's expression softened at her answer. He felt a bit guilty for being so harsh.

"Yeah, I know. Sadly, it'll never be that simple..." Lavi whispered softly before regaining his grin. "But, anyway! What about you?"

"I already told you I'm not saying anything," the girl said firmly.

"Awwwww come on! I just told you most of my life story! Tell me something!" the redhead whined.

The girl rolled her violet eyes in annoyance before saying, "Fine. I'll tell you one thing. I like fighting. Particularly kicking. But I'm also skilled with a range of weapons." This more or less took Lavi by surprise. More because she was a petite girl and nobody would expect her to be a fighter. Less because, well, he'd already felt her wrath. However, this did give him an idea as to how to befriend her.

"Weapons, you say? Be right back." Before even waiting for the girl's response, Lavi had run back into the trees to his stalking- er... I mean, "watching"- spot from earlier to retrieve his bow and arrows. He then returned to the girl, who eyed him cautiously. "Don't freak out, I'm not going to shoot you. I was going to ask if you want to shoot some arrows with me?"

The girls cautious expression changed to a smile of happiness and smugness as she nodded her head in agreement. Apparently, this was something she took pride in. And after an hour or so of s

hooting at random objects, Lavi knew why. This girl was a pro! She could hit ANYTHING within a possible range with perfect precision. It was as if she was born to shoot arrows!

"How do you do that?" Lavi asked, panting from attempting to mimic her shots but failing. The girl grinned.

"I have an excellent teacher."

"I'll say! You're by far the best archer I've ever seen! What else can you do?"

"Well, I'm the most skilled with hand to hand combat, but I've also been trained with the bow and arrows, throwing daggers, a few types of knives, and swords- particularly katanas." Lavi gaped.

"Damn! That's a lot! The only fighting skills I can truly take pride in are my skills with hammers and mallets, but that isn't much. I'm also okay with hand to hand combat, but it didn't take me long to figure out that you're way better!" Lavi rubbed the bandages over his cheek in painful reminiscence. The girl giggled softly.

"I guess so. So, hammers, huh? I've never used one of those in a fight before."

"Really? You really should. It's fun to smash things," Lavi stated before an idea popped into his head. "Hey, I have an idea! I'll teach you how to fight with a hammer if you'll teach me some hand to hand combat!" he offered.

The girl seemed to consider this briefly before giving in with a smile. "Alright! Sounds like fun!" Lavi resisted the urge to chuckle at how the appeal of fighting overcame her sense of cautiousness.

"Yay! Okay, so who's teaching first?"

The girl shrugged. "I guess I will. Okay, so to begin..." The next several hours flew by as the girl taught Lavi all sorts of fighting skills that he'd never even heard of, such as the proper stance, where people's sensitive points are, and how to deliver a blow that could probably send someone halfway to the sun. She then moved on to defensive techniques and counterattacking. Lavi couldn't help but admire her vast knowledge of empty handed fighting and her great teaching skills. She taught at a pace that was neither too fast or too slow for Lavi and helped him practice the techniques until he had them mastered. By the time the two had finished their teaching session, the sun was halfway below the horizon.

"Wow, girl! That was awesome! I feel so much more skilled!" Lavi exclaimed in joy. "Thanks so much for teaching me!" The girl smiled at him. About halfway through her teaching session, she'd finally given up on the whole "not saying a thing and being a cold bitch" thing and started acting more casual and open. Lavi found that he could read her like a book for the most part, but at the same time found himself wondering about her. He loved it.

"No problem. You're a pretty fast learner! You picked everything up really quickly. Though I could still easily kick your butt if I wanted to," she replied with a playful grin.

Lavi raised his hands as if surrendering but grinned as well. "Okay! Okay! I'll take your word for it!" He then remembered his part of the agreement. "Now, to teach you how to fight with a hammer!" To the redhead's surprise and slight disappointment, however, the girl shook her head.

"Not today. It's getting dark, and my guardians will be worried sick if they haven't died of heart attacks already. I need to get back home now." Lavi nodded his head in understanding, his mood suddenly sour. He actually enjoyed the company of the green haired girl. She was strong and interesting and actually really nice once she'd stopped acting and had a bit of an attitude. Okay, maybe more than a bit, but that just made her even more entrancing. Lavi was almost crestfallen to hear that she had to go until she spoke again. "So, I'll see you tomorrow so we can continue, okay?"

Lavi blinked in confusion before beaming. "So there's a tomorrow?" The girl chuckled rolling her eyes in mock annoyance.

"Obviously. How about we meet here again at noon tomorrow? Sound good?" Lavi nodded his head eagerly earning an even wider smile from the girl. "Good. But I'm holding you to it. Don't come, and I'll hunt you down with my bucket." Lavi nodded his head even more quickly, fear momentarily flashing in his emerald eyes.

"Anything at all! Just please get rid of that bucket!" The girl chuckled.

"Alright." She then set the bucket on the ground and, to the redhead's surprise, kicked it with enough force to send it all the way across the clearing and against a tree harshly. She then went to retrieve it. However, even though the girl had kicked it with enough force to shatter an elephant's skull, there was only the slightest dent on the bucket's metal surface.

Lavi gaped at the object. "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING MADE OF?!"

The girl shrugged. "No clue. This thing hasn't even been touched by magic."

Lavi gulped. "Well, just please don't bring it with you anymore. It scares me."

The girl burst out laughing. "Okay. So, until tomorrow?" Lavi nodded.

"Yep. I'll see you then." The girl then smiled again and began to walk in the opposite direction from where Lavi had come. The redhead turned to leave as well when he was stopped by the girl's voice again.

"Oh, and Lavi?" He turned to look at her.

"Yes?"

She smiled. "It's Lenalee. My name is Lenalee," the girl said before breaking into a run and disappearing into the trees, death bucket in hand.

Lavi stood there for several moments before smiling softly to himself and murmuring, "Lenalee. I'll definitely remember that," and walking back the way he'd originally come with his possessions.

**_..._**

Lenalee happily ran through to forest back to her cottage. She'd had an amazing day, and it was all because of a certain redhead named Lavi. When she'd first seen him, he'd definitely scared her. For one thing, she'd grown up never seeing anyone except for Allen, Kanda, and Miranda, so she hadn't the slightest idea what to make of his fiery red hair and emerald green eyes. Then there was the fact that she'd been raised never to talk to strangers because they were dangerous. However, Lenalee had soon found herself completely ignoring the guidance her guardians had given her and not only talking to a stranger, but BEFRIENDING him. She didn't care though. She found herself to actually enjoy the cheerful redhead's company. His energetic personality was easily enough to bring a smile to her face. Eventually, even his formerly odd appearance started to come off as handsome in the young girl's eyes. So now, Lenalee was bubbling with joy at the thought of being able to see Lavi the next day.

Lenalee finally reached the cottage, quickly entering and singing, "I'm hooooome~"

"WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?" Miranda had immediately latched herself onto Lenalee and was now screeching and crying. Lenalee realized that she was only supposed to have been gone for an hour at most, and she'd been out the whole day. She considered telling Miranda about Lavi, but after remembering how she'd been told NOT to talk to strangers, decided against it.

"Well, you see, on my way to the river, I saw a deer and just had to follow it. Soon enough I ended up in a beautiful clearing surrounded by trees. I started exploring, and the next thing I knew, it was sunset," Lenalee lied expertly.

Miranda hugged her even tighter. "J-just please tell us next time when you're going to be out later t-than expected."

The teen nodded her head. "I promise I will. I'm going to go eat something for dinner. Mind putting my bucket away?"

The purple winged fairy nodded her head, and Lenalee handed her the bucket and started to walk away before being halted by Miranda's voice.

"Lenalee, your favorite bucket! It has a dent in it!"

"Oh, I know. I got bored at some point and kicked it. So if that's all, I'm gonna make a BLT now. Bye!" Lenalee said before walking off toward the kitchen and having a BLT for dinner. She then walked upstairs to her room to get ready for bed.

**_..._**

Miranda continued to stare at the bucket in shock for several minutes until Allen and Kanda saw her and walked up to her, each drinking a glass of water.

"Oi, Miranda, what's wrong?" Allen asked as both he and Kanda took sips of their drinks.

"L-Lenalee..." Miranda stuttered. "S-she kicked the bucket."

Allen and Kanda each spit out all of the water in their mouths. "WHAT?!" they screamed in unison, horror enveloping their features.

"S-she came home a few minutes ago acting really happy and saying she explored a beautiful clearing in the forest today. A-and her favorite bucket... I-it has a dent in it... S-she said she kicked it!"

Allen and Kanda both stared at Miranda oddly.

"Wait, so she's NOT dead?" Allen asked.

"Of course not."

The two boys each sighed in relief, silently thanking their lucky stars.

"So, wait, Miranda," Kanda began, "The reason Lenalee was gone for so long was because she was exploring?"

"Y-yes," Miranda stuttered. "B-but it's weird. S-she kicked her prized bucket. A-and now, it's dented..."

"But she loves that bucket!" Allen exclaimed.

"E-exactly. I-it's really strange."

"Hm," Kanda said, deep in thought. "It is strange. I know Lenalee, and she'd never kick a perfectly good bucket for no reason. But let's see if she keeps up this weird behavior or not before prying into it. Let's just be cautious for now." The other two fairies nodded in agreement.

"Little did they know, they weren't being cautious enough," a mysterious voice stated eerily.

"WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!" Kanda shouted.

"Good question," Allen agreed while searching around for the source of the mysterious 4th voice to find the white haired figure of NoName-chan casually sipping a Dr. Pepper on their couch. "HEY! What are you doing here, ...What's your name again?"

"NoName-chan," she answered.

"Whatever," Kanda growled. "How did you get in here?! The doors are locked!"

"The windows aren't."

"What are you, a stalker?"

"NO! Well, yes... But that's not why I'm here!"

"T-then why are you h-here?" Miranda stammered.

"Narration."

"You're narrating our lives?" Allen asked, raising an eyebrow.

"More or less, yeah."

"Che. I don't give a shit. GET OUT!" Kanda hollered before chasing NoName-chan, who was screaming in terror, out of the cottage with his katana.

**_..._**

Lenalee heard a high pitched scream and several clashes of metal against wood echo throughout the cottage as she tucked herself into bed.

"What was that?" she mumbled curiously, but fell asleep from the exhaustion of fighting all day before she could think about it too much.

**_Chapter 1 End_**

**_..._**

**NoName-chan: Woo~! Chapter 1!  
Lenalee: A BLT?  
NoName-chan: Yup.  
Lenalee: Why?  
NoName-chan: Because it was the first food that came to mind.  
Lenalee: But this is set in Medieval times! Where the hell was I supposed to get a BLT?  
NoName-chan: I'm sure you could've figured it out. Anyways, how'd you guys like the bucket abuse?  
Kanda: Loved it.  
Lavi: Hated it.  
Lenalee: WHY WOULD I DAMAGE A PERFECTLY GOOD BUCKET?!  
NoName-chan: BECAUSE! Anyways, I had SO MUCH FUN writing this chapter XD The death bucket is definitely going to make another appearance.  
Lavi: *Groan*  
Lenalee: I was such a badass in this chapter! XD  
Lavi: Why was Lenalee more manly than me?!  
NoName-chan: BECAUSE!  
Allen: AND WHY WOULD YOU MAKE LENALEE ACUSE KANDA AND ME OF SOMETHING LIKE THAT?! SHE WOULD NEVER DO THAT IN A MILLION YEARS!  
Lenalee: Actually….  
Allen: L-Lenalee?  
NoName-chan: Are you guys thinking what I'm thinking?  
Lenalee: Yup.  
Road: Hell yes.  
NoName: Then let's do it.  
*5 minutes later*  
Kanda and Allen: *tied to a chair together, Allen on Kanda's lap in a frilly pink Lolita dress, white stockings, and black Mary Janes*  
NoName-chan: *taking pictures*  
Lenalee: *attempting to stop nosebleed*  
Road: *smirking*  
Lavi: *Laughing ass off*  
Kanda and Allen: I HATE YOU.  
NoName-chan: Hey, Road, do you have any makeup and/or nail polish?  
Road: *Grin* I'll be right back. *Leaves room*  
Allen: *Whimpers*  
Lavi: So photogenic!  
Kanda: I'm going to end you.  
NoName-chan: Nope! He's a main character! He gets to live! Plus, he's also Lenalee's Prince in this.  
Lavi: FUCK YEAH! *Hugs Lenalee*  
Lenalee: *giggles*  
Komui: NNNNOOOOOOO! MY PRECIOUS LENALEE! GET AWAY FROM HER, YOU FILTHY OCTOPU-  
NoName-chan: *Knocks Komui out with my trusty shovel* NO WHINING!  
Lavi: *shudder* I'm not sure what's scarier: Lenalee's bucket or NoName-chan's shovel.  
Lenalee and NoName-chan: *Each holding either a bucket or a shovel* YOU SAY SOMETHING?  
Lavi: *yelp* N-NOPE.  
Road: I'm back~! *Walks into the room carrying a large assortment of makeup and nail polish*  
NoName-chan: Well, ladies? Shall we?  
Lenalee: Yes.  
*Another 5 minutes later*  
Allen: *nails painted sparkly pink. Face colored with light blush, pink eyeshadow, mascara, and cherry flavored lip gloss*  
NoName-chan: Perfect!  
Lenalee: I couldn't agree more!  
Road: Why the hell did I make Lenalee my doll in the actual series? Allen is WAY more fun to dress up!  
Kanda: What… The fuck….  
Allen: Hey, this actually isn't all that bad! This cherry lip gloss tastes awesome! *Licking off lip gloss*  
Lenalee: *Shriek* He's messing up his makeup!  
NoName-chan: *Knocks Allen out with shovel* NO LICKING!  
Kanda: That sounded wrong.  
NoName-chan: *Knocks Kanda out with shovel* NO ARGUING!  
Lavi: How was that arguing?  
NoName-chan: *knocks Lavi out with shovel* SHUT UP!  
Lenalee: Well, since NoName-chan has overused the shovel joke and almost killed all of our male cast members-  
Tyki: What about me?  
Road: YOU'RE NOT IN THIS STORY.  
Lenalee: -I think it's time for this overly long author note to end.  
NoName-chan: Til next time~!**


End file.
